Relationships

Ive always thought that I could be an artist one day....... So I decided to illustrate my thoughts today together with my awesome drawings done with the ever-handy, PAINT!

So, I've been thinking lately.. thinking a great deal in fact. Wondering if there was indeed something wrong with me to have people walking out from my life. ( or was it me walking out?) & i thought about my mistakes, about the things I did, or rather, never did. Then I decided, relationships, with friends, family, whatever, is just like two persons standing on a cliff.

We start off back facing each other, not knowing the existence of the other person. But when we finally turn around, be it at the same time or not, we realise that we're not alone on the cliff. We interact with that person, talk, laugh, share secrets, good times bad times. At times we even lay down together to enjoy the stars, or just have a good suntan on sunny days.

But as we become closer, we delve deeper inside and start to see some things that we didn notice when we first turned around. It could be something that we wanted to know, it could be something that we wished we didn see. But nonetheless, because you want to form a relationship with this person, you embrace everything about him/she. That includes things like a habit of picking noses ( urgh han), habit of burping real loudly ( urgh hc), habit of telling u about WDs, habit of judging people's level of pretty-ness, habit of lifting up their arms, habit of playing with their haird 4 out of 5mins... I mean, these are just some weird habits, not exactly flaws right? But my point is, as you get closer to a person, you'd see things that you don't really like. But that's fine because she probably saw something in you that she doesnt really like. If it's something really really bad, you'd tell each other about it. And if you're both able to accept it, instead of just blatantly rejecting your friend, refusing to admit that you have that flaw, it would be a stronger relationship.

Another inevitable little weed(haha!) that forms as people get closer is this thing called "expectations". I'm not kidding, unconsciously, you expect the person not to lie to you, you expect the person to say good things about you, you expect the person to help you instead of a stranger, you expect the person to be there.

The closer you get to a person, the more easily irritated you are. Using the case study of Jason Tey Shou Heng as an example: he gets irritated more easily with family members than with friends. I'm sure that happens to all of us too, & this is built on the fact tt our family members has seen all the different ugly sides of us and we expect them not to be upset when we get irritated. No?

Just look at the way chiew mei jing talks to her mum, the way i talk to my dad and the way peipei talks to her mum. It's real!

So when you expect more from the other party on the cliff, you take a step forward. Because the person loves you, he takes a step backwards.

You, on the other hand, become so used to taking the step forward, continue to step forward, until the person eventually falls off the cliff to another cliff and YOU on the other hand, are left on the cliff.. Alone.. Pathetic and full of regret.

Say if initially, the red person decides to stop backing up, and wants to step forward, he might not fall off the cliff. If the blue stickman still refuses to back up, a wall will form. It continues to build up and become thicker and thicker. Before you know it, it becomes almost impossible to tear that wall down.

But if at that point of time, the blue stickman decides that Oh yes! i should be giving in, and takes a few steps back, then all would be good ^^

Another scenario would be if both stickmen decides to keep giving in and giving in and take steps back back back back back, they would both fall of the cliff hahhaha.

Or say, at any point of time in the relationship, one of them decides to turn their back on the other, and refuses to budge no matter how many times the person tries to tap on their shoulder, nothing will happen. The other person will just give up eventually.

My point in this whole storyboard thing is that, in a relationship, we should give and take, expect less, love more. Let the good points blur the flaws.

I'm sorry I never took the initiative to talk to you, to clear whatever mess up. The wall between us is so tall, thick and sturdy, there's no way I can bring it down alone. I'm sorry that because of us, we now don't go out as a big group anymore. I'm really sorry the way our friendship turned out. I'm at a lost because you're so far away. You're like a stranger and I have no idea how to bring our friendship back.

I'm sorry I only looked at your flaws when in fact, you're an awesome person with an awesome personality. I hope you've become a stronger, better person and I hope you take away with you good memories of VJ instead of just anger, hate and sadness.

I'm sorry that I didn make an effort to get to know you better. Our meetups have only been to study, gossip, tuition, nothing more. We might not admit it, but in fact there was actually a really thin wall between us. Now, I just had to make it worse. Im sorry for that too.

Vj has let me seen alot of different kinds of people that I never knew existed, I learnt so much from everyone and I can't thank you guys enough for that. Ultimately, I believe that everyone has a good heart, inherently kind-hearted and nice. If we are all willing to take a step back when the situation calls for, be genuinely sincere to everyone around us, this world could be a better place.

I love you, for coming and going.